“In contrast with (my) generation, which had spent most of its time online learning to code so that it could add crude butterfly animations to the backgrounds of its weblogs, the generation immediately following had spent most of its time online making incredibly bigoted jokes in order to laugh at the idiots who were stupid enough to think that they meant it. Except that after a while they did mean it, and then somehow at the end of it they were white supremacists. Was this always how it happened?”
Patricia Lockwood, London Review of Books, Feb 2019

“This is the Trump way. Fire, fire, fire with the blunderbuss and don’t worry if a shot or two hits an innocent bystander. Keep moving forwards – even as your opponents return fire. Never seriously consider the criticisims, just loose off more shots. It is a strategy that has benefitted Britain’s Trump tribute act, Boris Johnson. As an opinion columnist on The Telegraph , Johnson specialised in offence, from writing in 2002 that the Queen loved the Commonwealth because “it supplies her with regular cheering crowds of flag-waving picaninnies” to his recent descriptions of Muslim women in burqas “looking like letterboxes”. Such comments are deliberate provocation, pushing the boundaries of what it is permissible for a senior politician to say. IN AN ATTENTION ECONOMY, THEY ARE HARD CURRENCY. Any backlash can be portrayed as “political correctness gone mad” or “liberal Stalinism”. Even having to say sorry can be taken as proof that once again, the liberal totalitarians have triumphed. It is a game in which every path leads to victory. Yes, it is divisive, but for every voter who is repulsed, the calculation is, another is attracted.”
Helen Lewis, New Statesman, 7th June 2019

1) SNOWFLAKE/TORNAD0 – LONDON

I’m doing a new stand-up show for the back end of 2019 and the first half of 2020. More national dates from Feb 2020 will be announced later in the year, but I am going to do less than last time, but with longer runs in bigger rooms to hit the same demand, sadly, as the length of the last run nearly killed me, as you can see from the BBC film of the show.
The initial London dates will be work in progress, with a free DVD of CONTENT PROVIDER for all ticket holders and fans of obsolete physical media. Tons of fun!
I will film this show/these shows in the Summer of 2020 for offloading to whatever content platforms are still viable at that stage in late capitalism’s technologically-driven cultural decline.

David Johnson & John Mackay in association with Debi Allen/Curtis Brown present
STEWART LEE – SNOWFLAKE/TORNADO.

Double-bill of two new 60-ish minute sets, back to back nightly from “the world’s greatest living stand-up” (Times).

Tornado questions a shipwrecked Stew’s position in the comedy marketplace after Netflix mistakenly lists his show as “reports of sharks falling from the skies are on the rise again. Nobody on the Eastern Seaboard is safe.” What is anything? Is it this?
And Snowflake questions our worth in a collapsing society which no longer shares the liberal values we have for so long been keen to be seen to espouse, in a fairy-tale landscape of winter wonder.  Tons of fun!

SNOWFLAKE/TORNADO Work-in-Progress and DVD LAUNCH
Leicester Square Theatre, London.
A run of work-in-progress gigs to celebrate the DVD launch of his celebrated last live show CONTENT PROVIDER.
Each ticket will include a very special limited edition copy of the new DVD, exclusively available to bookers of this live show.
Stewart will be signing copies after the show.

Sept 24th, 25th, 26th, 27th, 28th – 7pm start
Oct 1st , 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th Oct – – 8.45pm start
2 hrs including interval
£26.50 including DVD of Content Provider (RRP £19.95)

Stewart Lee – Snowflake/Tornado.
Leicester Square Theatre, London.

October – December 2019
Tues 29th October 8.45pm – Sat Dec 14th
No Mondays, No Sundays, & not Sat Nov 30th

January 2020
Thurs 2nd Jan 8.45pm – Sat 25th Jan
No Mondays, No Sundays, & not Jan 9th
8.45 pm Stewart on stage
2 hrs + interval

Tues, Weds, Thurs £27.50
Friday & Saturday £29.50

All shows are 14+ apparently. If you are under 14 you are too immature to enjoy my swearing and farts.

In the case of sold out shows, there are often returns added, & Leicester Square maintain a waiting list, so check with the venue.

SEPTEMBER 2019

Tuesday 24th – WORK-IN-PROGRESS with Free ‘Content Provider’ DVD – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 7pm – SOLD OUT
Wednesday 25th – WORK-IN-PROGRESS with Free ‘Content Provider’ DVD – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 7pm – SOLD OUT
Thursday 26th – WORK-IN-PROGRESS with Free ‘Content Provider’ DVD – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 7pm – SOLD OUT
Friday 27th – WORK-IN-PROGRESS with Free ‘Content Provider’ DVD – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 7pm – SOLD OUT
Saturday 28th – WORK-IN-PROGRESS with Free ‘Content Provider’ DVD – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 7pm – SOLD OUT

OCTOBER 2019

Tuesday 1st – WORK-IN-PROGRESS with Free ‘Content Provider’ DVD – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – SOLD OUT
Wednesday 2nd – WORK-IN-PROGRESS with Free ‘Content Provider’ DVD – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – SOLD OUT
Thursday 3rd – WORK-IN-PROGRESS with Free ‘Content Provider’ DVD – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – SOLD OUT
Friday 4th – WORK-IN-PROGRESS with Free ‘Content Provider’ DVD – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – SOLD OUT
Saturday 5th – WORK-IN-PROGRESS with Free ‘Content Provider’ DVD – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – SOLD OUT

OCTOBER 2019

Tuesday 29th – SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – SOLD OUT
Wednesday 30th – SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – SOLD OUT
Thursday 31st – SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – SOLD OUT

NOVEMBER 2019

Friday 1st SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – SOLD OUT
Saturday 2nd SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – SOLD OUT

Tuesday 5th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Wednesday 6th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Thursday 7th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – SOLD OUT
Friday 8th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – SOLD OUT
Saturday 9th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – SOLD OUT

Tuesday 12th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Wednesday 13th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Thursday 14th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Friday 15th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – SOLD OUT
Saturday 16th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – SOLD OUT

Tuesday 19th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Wednesday 20th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Thursday 21st SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Friday 22nd SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – SOLD OUT
Saturday 23rd SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – SOLD OUT

Tuesday 26th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Wednesday 27th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Thursday 28th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Friday 29th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS

DECEMBER 2019

Tuesday 3rd SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Wednesday 4th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Thursday 5th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Friday 6th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – SOLD OUT
Saturday 7th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS

Tuesday 10th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Wednesday 11th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Thursday 12th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Friday 13th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Saturday 14th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS

JANUARY 2020

Thursday 2nd SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Friday 3rd SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Saturday 4th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS

Tuesday 7th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Wednesday 8th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Friday 10th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Saturday 11th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS

Tuesday 14th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Wednesday 15th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Thursday 16th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Friday 17th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Saturday 18th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS

Tuesday 21st SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Wednesday 22nd SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Thursday 23rd SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Friday 24th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS
Saturday 25th SNOWFLAKE / TORNADO – Leicester Square Theatre, London – 8.45pm – TICKETS

“There’s no-one else to touch him” Mark Wareham, Mail On Sunday *****

“Lee remains one of the best stand-ups in the country” ***** Metro

“The world’s best living stand-up comedian” Dominic Maxwell, The Times

“He makes stand-up almost a moral pursuit, … that makes the usual (and more popular) stand-ups seem crude and obvious.” Alan Bennet, London Review Of Books.

“Proper, vicious prejudice – a self-proclaimed inhabitant of the moral high ground” Sarah Vine, Daily Mail

“A pot-bellied Bernard Manning for snowflakes” Tony Parsons, The Sun

“Woke, enlightened, professionally sensitive, BBC-approved comedian who can be guaranteed to dress to the left. The rancid tip of a cesspit.” – Tony Parsons, GQ

“If I could bring one extinct thing back to life it would be Stewart Lee’s sense of humour.” Frankie Boyle, The Guardian

“The opposite of what really good comedy should be” Toby Young, Radio 4

“Truly, he is the Oscar Wilde of our times” – Gary Bushell, The Daily Star

NB – I DID 5 MONTHS IN TOTAL AT LST OF CONTENT PROVIDER BETWEEN 2016-2018, AND THEN 4 ROYAL FEST HALLS AND THEY ALL SOLD OUT.
ONCE THESE DATES ARE DONE I AM NOT COMING BACK FOR MORE THIS TIME SO GET TICKETS IF YOU WANT THEM.

2) SNOWFLAKE/TORNADO 2020 TOUR

Currently confirmed / onsale as follows.

NOTE: This is not the complete list. More national dates are currently being added & confirmed & will be announced soon.

Not all dates are currently on sale.
As further dates are announced / go on sale, they will be listed on the Live Dates page of the website & via this newsletter as they come in.

January 2020

Tuesday 28th January 2020 – 7.30pm – Colosseum, Watford – TICKETS
Wednesday 29th January 2020 – 7.30pm – Playhouse, Nottingham TICKETS
Thursday 30th January 2020 – 7.30pm – Playhouse, Nottingham – TICKETS
Thursday 31st January 2019 – 7.30pm – Playhouse, Nottingham – TICKETS

February 2020

Saturday 1st February 2020 – 7.30pm – Playhouse, Nottingham – TICKETS
Tuesday 4th February 2020 – 7.30pm – Philharmonic Hall, Liverpool – TICKETS
Wednesday 5th February 2020 – 7.30pm – Philharmonic Hall, Liverpool – TICKETS
Thursday 6th February 2020 – City Hall, Sheffield – TICKETS
Friday 7th February 2020 – City Hall, Sheffield – TICKETS
Wednesday 12th February 2020 – 8pm DeMontfort Hall, Leicester – TICKETS
Thursday 13th February 2020 – 7.30pm – New Theatre Royal, Lincoln – TICKETS
Friday 14th February 2020 – 7.30pm – New Theatre, Peterborough – TICKETS
Saturday 15th February 2020 – 7.30pm – Opera House, Buxton – TICKETS
Tuesday 18th February 2020 – 7.30pm – The Dome, Brighton – TICKETS
Wednesday 19th February 2020 – 7.30pm – The Dome, Brighton – TICKETS
Thursday 20th February 2020 – 7.30pm – The Dome, Brighton – TICKETS
Friday 21st February 2020 – 7.30pm – The Dome, Brighton – TICKETS
Monday 24th February 2020 – 7.30pm – Playhouse, Oxford – TICKETS
Tuesday 25th February 2020 – 7.30pm – Playhouse, Oxford – TICKETS
Wednesday 26th February 2020 – 7.30pm – Playhouse, Oxford – TICKETS
Thursday 27th February 2020 – 7.30pm – Playhouse, Oxford – TICKETS
Friday 28th February 2020 – 7.30pm – Playhouse, Oxford – TICKETS
Saturday 29th February 2020 – 7.30pm – Playhouse, Oxford – TICKETS

March 2020

Tuesday 3rd March 2020 – ON SALE SOON – Festival Theatre, Malvern
Wednesday 4th March 2020 – ON SALE SOON – St. David’s Hall, Cardiff
Friday 6th March 2020 – ON SALE SOON – Royal & Derngate, Northampton
Tuesday 10th March 2020 – 8pm – The Hexagon, Reading – TICKETS
Wednesday 11th March 2020 – 8pm – The Hexagon, Reading – TICKETS
Thursday 12th March 2020 – ON SALE SOON – Symphony Hall, Birmingham
Friday 13th March 2020 – ON SALE SOON – Symphony Hall, Birmingham
Tuesday 17th March 2020 – 7.30pm – Marlowe Theatre, Canterbury – TICKETS
Wednesday 18th March 2020 – 8pm – De La Warr Pavillion , Bexhill On Sea – TICKETS
Thursday 19th March 2020 – 8pm – Corn Exchange, Cambridge – TICKETS
Friday 20th March 2020 – 8pm – Corn Exchange, Cambridge – TICKETS
Monday 23rd March 2020 – ON SALE SOON – Playhouse, Leeds
Tuesday 24th March 2020 – ON SALE SOON – Playhouse, Leeds
Wednesday 25th March 2020 – ON SALE SOON – Playhouse, Leeds
Thursday 26th March 2020 – ON SALE SOON – King’s Theatre, Glasgow
Friday 27th March 2020 – 7.30pm – Theatre Royal, Newcastle Upon Tyne – TICKETS
Saturday 28th March 2020 – 7.30pm – Theatre Royal, Newcastle Upon Tyne – TICKETS

April 2020

Wednesday 29th April 2020 – 7.30pm – Lyric Theatre @ The Lowry, Salford Quays – TICKETS
Thursday 30th April 2020 – 7.30pm – 7.30pm – Lyric Theatre @ The Lowry, Salford Quays – TICKETS

May 2020

Friday 1st May 2020 – 7.30pm – Lyric Theatre @ The Lowry, Salford Quays – TICKETS
Saturday 2nd May 2020 – 7.30pm – Lyric Theatre @ The Lowry, Salford Quays – TICKETS
Sunday 3rd May 2020 – ON SALE SOON – Machynlleth (Comedy Festival)
Saturday 16th May 2020 ON SALE SOON – Theatre Royal, Plymouth
Sunday 17th May 2020 ON SALE SOON – Theatre Royal, Plymouth

NB VIAGOGO ETC.

Tickets have started appearing at up to 4 times face value on the ticket-bastard website Viagogo, specifically for the Sheffield shows, with doubtless more to follow.
I know which seats these are and I will come down from the stage and find anyone who has bought from Viagogo, or Stubhub, and I will throw them out personally and I will not refund them at a later date.

If you want to buy illegal tickets and have the money refunded go and see soft-hearted Rhod Gilbert, who will do this out of his own money. I will not. There is no need to cooperate with these criminals.
Tickets will be available at normal rates from the venue and I will endeavour to add on extra dates to meet any demand.

3) SNOWFLAKE/TORNADO WORK IN PROGRESSES

I am doing 3 work in progress shows at Susan Murray’s RED IMP comedy club in Walthamstow in September. The dates are;

Monday 9th September
Tuesday 10th September
Thursday 12th September

Red Imp is a small club and tickets always go out to their mailing list subscribers first, so sign up to their mailing list here to be the first to know when they are released in September.

The Red Imp Website is here for further info.

I am also doing several more work in progress shows at The Bill Murray pub in Islington. The dates are;

Tuesday 17th September (9.30pm – 10.30pm)
Wednesday 18th September (9.30pm – 10.30pm)
Thursday 19th September (8pm – 9.30pm)
Sunday 22nd September (7.00 – 10pm w/interval)

These are now all sold out, but you might be able to get returns on their website.

4) EDINBURGH FRINGE

This is now all sold out via The Stand & Edfringe.com, but you might be able to get returns.

I have also added an EXTRA SHOW on 14th August at 11.50am, tickets should appear on The Stand’s website soon.

THE SHOW IS A WORK IN PROGRESS BETWEEN THE 9th & 15th AUGUST (7.10pm) AT THE NEW TOWN THEATRE.

5) CONTENT PROVIDER DVD

CONTENT PROVIDER has dropped off the BBC I-player.
I know they are allowed to put it on there three more times, but they do tend to need a nudge. Perhaps they will show it again. Who knows?

All four series of COMEDY VEHICLE are still up on there anyway. See how the world has changed for the worse in a decade. How quaint the liberal’s manageable dilemmas of 2013 seem now.

The third, and perhaps best, series of COMEDY VEHICLE seems to be on Netflix in the UK and, I think, the US.
It seems you can also stream CARPET REMNANT WORLD and the first 3 series of COMEDY VEHICLE on Chris Ramsey’s Amazon channel, here and I think in the US.

Beats me! And, as I said above, CONTENT PROVIDER will be available as an Old Skool physical media DVD in the Autumn.
Tons of fun!

6) oxide ghosts/wok in progress

Fire Records, Films and Comedy present: ONE NIGHT ON EARTH.
Stewart Lee Upfront Work-In-Progress Show/ Oxide Ghosts: The Brass Eye Tapes Film Screening presented by Michael Cumming.

Extra show Monday Sept 16th

https://earthackney.seetickets.com/event/stewart-lee-oxide-ghosts-the-brass-eye-tapes/earth-theatre-stoke-newington/1382942

7) King Rocker Doc

Michael Cumming (Brass Eye), James Nicholls (Fire films) and I are now 1/3rd of the way through filming and editing and are looking for donations to complete the film below, which is about Birmingham post-punk survivors The Nightingales. Everyone who donates, no matter how big or how small*, will be featured in the end credits

*(I think this sentence, written by James from Fire, relates to the size of the donation, not the donor.)

https://www.kingrockerfilm.com/

There is now a podcast radio thing you can listen to of me and Michael talking about The Nightingales here.

8) Sleaford Mods

Sleaford Mods are playing the Hammersmith Apollo, London on Friday 15th November 2019.

I am bottom of the bill supporting them on a line-up that also includes Viagra Boys and Horse Meat Disco (DJ Set). Then I am rushing off to Leics Sq.

You can get tickets here.

9) NEW BOOK – March Of The Lemmings

March of the Lemmings – Brexit in Print and Performance 2016-2019

Due for release on 5th September 2019, Faber will publish comedian Stewart Lee’s next book, March of the Lemmings, based on his newspaper columns, providing “the scathing, riotous record the Brexit era deserves”.

“As a Metropolitan Elitist Snowflake, Stewart Lee was disappointed by the Brexit referendum result of 2016. But he knew how to weaponise his inconvenience. He would treat all his subsequent writing, until we left the EU, as interrelated episodes of a complete work. The cast of characters include Lemming-obsessed Michael Gove, violent tanning-salon entrepreneur Tommy Robinson and Boris Piccaninny Watermelon Bumboys Letterbox Cake Disaster Weightloss Haircut Bullshit Johnson.”

There is also a “a dramatic chorus is made up of online commenters and Kremlin bots” with Lee cast as the “defeated, unreliable narrator-hero, whose resolve and tolerance would gradually unravel as the horror show dragged on.

Drawing on three years of newspaper columns, a complete transcript of the ‘Content Provider’ stand-up show, and Lee’s caustic footnote commentary, March of the Lemmings is the scathing, riotous record the Brexit era deserves.”

Special Offer for Newsletter subscribers…

To Claim £3 off ‘March Of The Lemmings’ click here to go to the Waterstones website & enter the code “LEMMINGS“.

The code is not case sensitive, and the discount will be live from now until the end of August.

Meanwhile, I Arrogantly Recommend Fixed Horizon, & Edinburgh Fringe faves

FIXED HORIZON which did some of the incidental music for CONTENT PROVIDER has a bandcamp page here https://fixedhorizon.bandcamp.com

EDINBURGH FRINGE FAVES

Why recommend anything in Edinburgh? The national professional critic shortage means that while there are no end of websites staffed by people with no idea about anything, the amount of material written by people who have seen enough stuff, and have a wide enough frame of reference, to make even partially informed judgements, is declining.

How astounding it seemed, just over three decades ago, when the Guardian unveiled what I think was the country’s first dedicated comedy critic in the form of William Cook. How strange it seems now that the profession is largely an enclave of amateurs, with the notion of ‘a buzz’ easily manipulated by social media, savvy cynical PRs and papered houses. Remove the gatekeepers of abstract notions of value and you end up with people essentially paying their way into their own Amazon special.

I don’t have any answers. It’s three years since I last went to the Fringe, and 33 since I first went, with thirty Summers of performing in-between. The world changes, and modern performers live in a web of digital non-judgemental across-the-board mutual self-promotion that I don’t understand. Doubtless recommending anything here will cause problems and see me blamed for the things I haven’t recommended, and my reasons for not recommending them spuriously speculated upon by dicks. It is years since I was anywhere near what you could call a comedy circuit regular and so I know very few comics under 30. My tastes in comedy are somewhat fixed by the era I came of age in, and by the innovations of the period, and probably by the demographic spread of people that the stand-up circuit encompassed back then.

I do not, for example, understand how DAVE is the new sponsor of the awards, but I can’t articulate precisely why this bothers me; I can now barely remember the ideological and moral anxieties that mean I still harbour a deep suspicion of the big 3 venues, with their separate brochure; I don’t know exactly why I feel that a ticket purchased for a show at a STAND or FREE FRINGE or SUMMERHALL venue somehow makes the world a better place and sticks it to the man, but I know it makes sense; I am not involved in any theatre at any level, and so my opinions about what to see in one should be discounted; my musical recommendations reflect the tastes of a man whose own personal musical highlights of 2019 so far have been Archie Shepp, Guided by Voices, Bob Dylan and Neil Young; and as far as Art goes, I know what art is but I don’t know what I like.

But, without further caveats, here are my EDINBURGH FRINGE 2019 tips.
Other performers are available. Your pants may go up as well as down.

2 CHILDREN’S SHOWs

Swallow The Sea Caravan Theatre – Summerhall 11am – 5.30pm
Paul Currie – Release The Baboons for Kids – Heroes Boteco – 12noon

5 BITS OF ART

Grayson Perry – Dovecote Studios
Bridget Riley – National Gallery of Scotland
A Young Man Dressed As A Gorilla – Liquid Rooms – 10th 2.30pm
Phoebe Traquair Mural Tours – St Mary’s Cathedral – 11.30 am
Knitted Bible Stories – Salvation Army Main Hall 19th – 24th

2 DANCE PIECES

Extremely Pedestrian Chorales – Summerhall – 8.30pm
Feast – Summerhall – 10.20pm

10 MUSICS

Icelandic Folk Songs – St Marks – 5th, 8th, 10th, 2.30
Blueswater Queens of The Blues – Jazz Bar – 2nd, 9th, 4pm; 11th, 1th, 23rd 5.30pm
Madness – Princes St Gardens – 18th 6pm
Blueswater presents Blues – Surgeon’s Hall – 7.10pm
Orange Claw Hammer (Beefheart Tribute) – Henry’s – 10th, 16th – 8pm
The Singing Sixties – Queens Hall – 12th 8pm
Ska at The Fringe – A Club – 10th, 16th, 23rd 9.30pm
Colin Steele plays Cannonball Adderley – Jazz Bar – 12th-13th – 10pm
Tim Vine Presents Plastic Elvis – Underbelly Circus – 10.15pm 7th
Random folk sessions – Captain’s Bar – most nights

15 BLIND GUESSES AT GOOD THEATRE PIECES

** Paul Putner’s Embarassment – Frankenstein – 6.15pm. Putner has been threatening this skinhead memoir for 25 years and finally it is here. **

ALSO
2) Funny In Real Life – Gilded Balloon – 11.15am
3) Krapp’s Last Tape – Royal Scots Club – 11.30am
4) Wireless Operator – Pleasance Courtyard – 12.40pm
5) Forgiveness – Summerhall – 2.30pm
6) Adolf – Stand New Town Theatre – 3.50pm
7) Inflatable Space – Assembly Roxy – 4.15pm
8) The Nights by Henry Naylor – Gilded Balloon – 4.15pm
9) The Castle (puppet Kafka) – Greenside Infirmary Street – 4.15pm
10/11) Trilogy of Horrors 1 & 2 – Scottish Storytelling Centre – 7.30pm & 9.30pm
12-15) James Roland’s Team Viking/100 Different Words For Love/Revelations/Songs of Friendship (in rotation) – Summerhall – 9pm

15 COMEDIANS

** ROSIE JONES – PLEASANCE CTYARD – 7pm. My tip for 2019!**
also
2) Michael Legge – Stand 1 – 12 midday – Northern Ireland’s criminally undervalued master of pent-up fury
3) Tony Law – Monkey Barrel – 12.15pm – Canada’s master of surrealist mayhem
4) Seymour Mace – Stand 3 – 1.30pm – Manchester’s criminally undervalued master of surrealist misery. This year with model houses!
5) Jessica Fostekew – Monkey Barrel – 1.30pm Waspish observations from the woman who secretly writes all your favorite comedians’ jokes
6) Eleanor Tiernan – Banshee Labyrinth – 2.20pm Ireland’s criminally undervalued mistress of deadpan downbeats
7) Simon Munnery’s Alan Parker – Stand 1 – 3.20pm. Munnery’s parody of a punk rock anarcho snowflake, hand drawn with real love for its subject, returns to a world worse than any he could have imagined in his home decade of the 1980s.
8) David Kay – Stand 3 – 4.30pm Scotland’s criminally undervalued master of kitchen sink surrealism
9) Will Adamsdale – Underbelly, Bristo Sq – 6pm – Unparalleled genius of immersive art comedy returns.
10) Henning Wehn – Queen’s Hall – 7pm Germany’s master of the personally political
11) Sarah Kendall – Assembly George Sq – 7pm Australia’s criminally undervalued mistress of the spellbinding story
12) David O’Doherty – Assembly George Sq – 7.30pm. Ireland’s master of very low energy musical whimsy.
13) Josie Long – Stand 1 – 8.20pm – Essex’s mistress of the personally political
14) Paul Currie – Heroes Hive – 9pm – Northern Ireland’s master of surrealist mayhem
15) Nish Kumar – Assembly George Sq – 9pm – See him not behind a desk! With actual human legs!! The Angela Rippon of snowflake comedy!!!