Could Jennifer Arcuri save us from our doom? - October 2019 The Observer - By Stewart Lee - October 13th, 2019

The American businessperson Jennifer Arcuri was a beneficiary of more than £126,000 in public money, £11,500 of which came from a City Hall-funded agency during Boris Piccaninny Watermelon Letterbox Cake Bumboys Vampires Haircut Wall-Spaffer Spunk-Burster Fuck-Business Fuck-The-Families Get-Off-My-Fucking-Laptop Girly-Swot Big-Girl’s-Blouse Chicken-frit Hulk-Smash Noseringed-Crusties Death-Humbug French-Turds Johnson’s tenure as mayor of London. On 24 September, a…

Boris Johnson feels the ire of Prometheus - September 2019 The Observer - By Stewart Lee - September 29th, 2019

Even though I am an atheist, I am nonetheless a creative artist. And so the gods regularly manifest themselves to me in my hours of need. Perhaps you envy me my ability to hear the voice of the divine? I in turn envy you non-artists the peaceful silences of your own empty minds. On Wednesday…

When in doubt, erect a Boris bridge… - September 2019 The Observer - By Stewart Lee - September 15th, 2019

In the late 80s I used to do standup at a Soho club called Raging Bull, run by the young Eddie Izzard. At half-time we shared our dressing room with male strippers from The Paul Raymond Carnival of Erotica. They would sit naked in their chairs, casually chatting and masturbating, but not for pleasure, merely…

Is Iain Duncan Smith the Brexit bogeyman? - September 2019 The Observer - By Stewart Lee - September 8th, 2019

‘Everyone will have the food they need,” declared Michael Gove to Andrew Marr last Sunday, denying both the lies of Project Fear and the hysterical, biased, ill-informed and suppressed research of his own department. On Tuesday, as the Commons camera drifted past Ken Clarke, I saw the Brexit cheerleader Iain Duncan Smith picking his nose…

Revealed: Boris Johnson’s secret weapon for a no-deal Brexit - August 2019 The Observer - By Stewart Lee - August 18th, 2019

How many small plastic toy egg casings could be hidden in, for example, a Michael Gove? And, if we knew this figure, and had an accurate idea of potential volunteer multiple plastic toy egg couriers, could we extrapolate from it the volume of goods that might be secretly transported, in this fashion, both in and…

Dude, I take no pleasure in having been right about Boris Johnson - July 2019 The Observer - By Stewart Lee - July 28th, 2019

I believe it was I who wrote in June 2017 in this very paper: “The secret Tory steering committee has always intended Boris Johnson to be leader of the party and Theresa May has only been put in place as a kind of palate cleanser, a nasty-tasting mouthwash that you swill around your gums before…