LONDON LIFES 9 – MERVIN GRIFFIN - March 2007 What's On In London - By Stewart Lee - March 20th, 2007

Mervin Griffin is a mythological heraldic beast with the body of a Lion and the wings and head of an Eagle. He lives in a nest in a tree on a small island on the River Thames in the South West London borough of Brentford, eating mainly dead rats and discarded MacDonalds packaging, and was…

LONDON LIFES 8 – A MOUSE - March 2007 What's On In London - By Stewart Lee - March 13th, 2007

Mus Musculus is a house mouse, currently resident in London’s fashionable West End. People say that in London that no-one is ever more than six feet away from a mouse. But we in the London Mouse Community have our own saying. “In London, no mouse is ever more than six feet away from a piece…

LONDON LIFES 7 – THE BABY MAN - March 2007 What's On In London - By Stewart Lee - March 6th, 2007

Peter Fleurdelys is employed by Hackney Council as a Men’s Birthing Awareness Generation Officer. I’m the Hackney Council Men’s Birthing Awareness Generation Officer. If you’ve ever attended an ante-natal class maybe you’ve already seen me. I come in late at the end of the official class wearing a cycling helmet, and hand out leaflets about…

LONDON LIFES 6 – PASTOR ISIAH ALI FARKA TOURE ISIAHSONS - February 2007 What's On In London - By Stewart Lee - February 27th, 2007

Pastor Isiah Ali Farka Toure Isiahsons is the General Secretary Major of The Allied Evangelicals, registered charity number 21232999axc56, who last week organised a Walk Against Bad Guns And Shootings in South London. “As we have seen all over London this month, guns are a menace to our society, and the Church should do something…

LONDON LIFES 5 – HELEN FITZROY - February 2007 What's On In London - By Stewart Lee - February 20th, 2007

Last year, Helen ‘Stinky’ Fitzroy briefly revived the forgotten Victorian London trade of Pure Taker, by gathering dog excrement from the streets around her Islington home, which she then attempted to sell to the Leather Industry. When I tell people that I once tried to sell dog excrement to strangers, they often look at me…

LONDON LIFES 4 – EDWARD SMITH - February 2007 What's On In London - By Stewart Lee - February 13th, 2007

Edward Smith is a snowman, based in Kings Cross. Due to increasingly mild weather, he has seen little active snowman service in the last decade. Having been assembled by a gang of children on a piece of wast eground off Pentonville Road during last week’s heavy snowfall, Edward is looking forward to seeing how the…